YOU NOTICE IT
The world feels unreal, strange or far away.
WOMEN’S SPECIALIST PSYCHOTHERAPIST Private Online Therapy · Worldwide · Brisbane-Based Client resources. Does the world feel unreal? Here’s why.
Does it feel like you’re watching life through glass, a screen or a fog? It’s frightening, it’s far more common than most people realise, and it isn’t a sign that you’re losing your mind.
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WHAT IT FEELS LIKE
You know you’re here. It just doesn’t feel like it.
This is called derealisation. It can last a few minutes, or come and go for weeks when you’re under strain.
- Behind glassLife feels like it’s happening on the other side of a window or a screen.
- Familiar looks unfamiliarYour own home, street or workplace looks oddly strange.
- Flat or dullColours seem washed out and sounds seem distant or muffled.
- DreamlikeThe world feels foggy, unreal, or like you’re in a film.
- DetachedYou’re going through the motions, but not quite present.
- FrighteningThe scariest part is often the thought: what if it never goes away?
WHAT’S HAPPENING
It isn’t in your head. It’s in your nervous system.
When your system has been under too much stress for too long – anxiety, panic, exhaustion, grief or trauma – it can pull the emergency brake. It turns the volume down on the world so you don’t feel the full force of what’s happening.
Think of it as a circuit breaker. It trips to protect you from overload. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s a protective response, not damage.
Your mind is still yours, and your grip on reality is still intact. The fact that you can notice something feels off is exactly what shows you’re still grounded.
WHY IT HANGS AROUND
The checking loop.
Derealisation usually fades on its own once the stress settles. What keeps it going is fear of the feeling itself.
YOU GET SCARED
“What’s wrong with me? Is this permanent?”
YOU START CHECKING
Do things still look weird? Am I still here? Is it getting worse?
THE ALARM STAYS ON
Checking tells your threat system you’re in danger, so the circuit breaker stays tripped.
The less you fight it and check it, the faster it lifts – not because you’ve given up, but because you’ve stopped telling your nervous system it’s in danger.
IF YOU NEED SOMETHING RIGHT NOW
You don’t have to make it go away. You only have to show your body it’s safe.
- Name it“This is derealisation. It’s my nervous system protecting me. It’s uncomfortable, not dangerous, and it will pass.”
- Slow your out-breathBreathe in gently for 4, then out slowly for 6 to 8. A longer out-breath tells your body to stand down.
- Use your sensesFind 5 things you can see, 4 you can hear, 3 you can touch, 2 you can smell and 1 you can taste. Describe them in detail.
- Feel your weightPress your feet into the floor and notice the chair holding you up. Wrap your hands around a warm mug.
- Get on with your dayWalk, cook, call a friend. Doing ordinary things while it’s there teaches your system it isn’t an emergency.
- Look after the basicsSleep, food and water, and less caffeine and alcohol. A depleted system trips its breaker more easily.
What doesn’t help: endless googling, checking how real things look, and staying home until it passes. These keep the alarm on.
COPING OR RESOLVING?
You shouldn’t have to keep coping with this.
Coping tools can help you get through a moment. They don’t change why it keeps happening.
My work is different. I don’t teach coping techniques. In session, we work on the patterns driving the symptom – the alarm underneath, and what set it off – with the aim of resolving it, so you’re not left managing it for the rest of your life.
Please see your GP if the feeling started suddenly with no obvious stress, after a head injury, illness or new medication, or alongside other new symptoms. It’s always worth ruling out a physical cause.
There is nothing wrong with you. Your system is protecting you the only way it knows how. It can learn to feel safe again.
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